Everyone Communicates - Few Connects !

Everyone Communicates - Few Connects !

Smart couples appreciate, not only how stressful life outside of our relationships becomes, but also how important it is to be able to vent about the common irritations, worries and challenges of our days.......

How do we complain in ways that connect?

1st : Consider the timing. You never really know what’s going on behind the scenes of your partner’s day, so get in the habit of tuning in and checking with your spouse about whether or not it is a good time to talk.

2nd: Perfect an 'skill' of active listening that improves our ability to simply be there for our spouse.....

* Don’t give unsolicited advice. 
* Show genuine interest by asking questions, nodding,'intonating' concern.
* Communicate understanding of your partner’s feelings.
* Take your spouse’s side.
* Express a “we against others” (Team)- attitude.
* Express affection both verbally & non-verbally while listening.
* Validate emotions; tell your partner that you can see reasons for the annoyance. 

# Take turns doing the 'complain-thing' by allowing one another, 10~15 minutes to complain. 

# Doing it in a relaxed spot: on the couch, or another favorite, comfortable place in your home. 

# At the very least, the value of practicing these conversations is two-fold:

- The complainer benefits from feeling less alone 

- The listener learns to develop the potential for being a resource and not part of the problem.
I Believe.......
We must train from the inside........ out.
Using our strengths to overcome and nullify -any weaknesses.
It’s not about denying a weakness may exist,
but........
..... about denying its right to persist!

Shalom .......... & Maranatha